Different? Normal!

Every human being is unique and therefore different from his fellow human beings.

At some point people came up with words to make the diversity of love and sexuality easier to understand. But the reality is much more colourful!

Many people don't want to be categorised in a certain compartment, rather just want to be as they are.

But it is good to know the words and to be able to use them correctly.
Using them to insult others is not fair!

Being lesbian - being gay

What is homosexuality?

Homosexuality is another word for being gay or lesbian and means sexual attraction to people of one's own sex. In colloquial terms, homosexual men are also called gays, while women are referred to as lesbians. Bisexuals are people who are sexually attracted to both sexes.

To prefer a same-sex partner is not somehow "abnormal", but one of many expressions of human sexuality.

If you have ever had tender feelings about someone who belongs to the same sex, you may have been a little confused. Many ask themselves at some point in time what is wrong with them and whether everything is "okay" with them.

Some girls and boys only feel attracted to their own gender for a while, others always do.

If this is the case with you, it is possible that self-doubts attack you and you ask yourself whether everything is "okay" with you. Maybe you are afraid of being "discovered" and are unsure how your family or circle of friends will react.

Making contact with other lesbian or gay youth (e.g. through special gay-lesbian youth clubs) can help you to see that you are not the only one. You can find like-minded people here who understand and support it. For further help and support, contact any of the pro familia counselling centres.

Take your time for your decision. Many people have sexual experiences with both sexes in the course of their lives.


When someone describes himself as bisexual, the person means that he or she falls in love with people of both sexes, sometimes with a man and sometimes with a woman (or sometimes with a boy, sometimes with a girl).

How often a bisexual person falls in love with people of the same or the opposite sex can be very different. Some adolescents discover already in puberty that they are bisexual.

Bisexuality is more common than many people think.


Most people in the world describe themselves as heterosexual.
This means that they fall in love mainly with people of the opposite sex. Women fall in love with men, men fall in love with women. Girls and boys also fall in love. Nobody can be forced to fall in love. Either it happens or it does not happen.

Since heterosexuality occurs most often, for many people it is
natural and "normal". Many think that all the others
around them are also heterosexual or have to be so,
although that's not the case.


If someone describes himself as intersexual, then the person is neither clearly male nor female biologically. For instance, male and female sex organs can be present at the same time. How exactly this can look inside and outside is very different.

Since 2013, there has been no cross on "male" or "female" box on the birth certificate on birth of an intersexual baby, rather this information is left to be filled. It is done so to avoid the baby being assigned a sex at an early age that turns out to be inappropriate when the person is older.

Intersexuality is rare, but more common than many think. About 1 in 5,000 babies are not clearly born male or female.


Some people feel they are in the wrong body. A man prefers to be a woman or a woman prefers to be a man. Children and adolescents also sometimes do not feel comfortable in their gender. A girl would rather be a boy and vice versa.

Under certain circumstances, TRANSSEXUALS in Germany can have the first name changed. They can also take medication or have themselves operated on in order to adapt to the opposite sex as much as possible.

Who transsexual people fall in love with can be very different.


Some people find 1000 other things more interesting than sex. Anyone who is not sexually attracted towards others at all is called asexual. Asexuals have no interest or desire for sex at all. But that doesn't always mean that they don't have sex. For instance, some asexuals sleep with their partner to give him or her pleasure, or because they want a child. Therefore, asexuality does not exclude romantic relationships. Asexuals fall in love like everyone else - with butterflies in their stomach and the whole nine yards. However, they usually want a relationship on a platonic basis - without sex.

Got more questions?

If you still want to know more about something, just contact our online consultation service or come to one of our counselling centres. Here, you can get answers to your personal questions!

Helpful links

Jugendnetzwerk Lambda (Lambda youth network): www.lambda-bb.de

Netzwerk DSD (Disorders of Sex Development network): www.netzwerk-dsd.uk-sh.de

Englische Übersetzung gefördert von:

English translation funded by: